Tuesday, August 12, 2008

The Jock

Rarely do I get an answer from the crowd that confounds me. Being a comic that works the crowd you are sorta like a lawyer; don't ask any question you don't think you already know the answer to. This is not always the case of course, but most of the time I am not too surprised by an answer.
Allow me to set the scene. This is a college/private gig. I say partly private because the entire audience was composed of 40 incoming Freshmen from all over the planet. We were in a tiny room that was 20 degrees warmer than just outside the door. The average age was 18. Do you remember being 18? Remember that look you had? No? It is something in your eyes and your body language. I can now identify it as not giving a shit. Did I mention this event was mandatory for them?
Let's revue- 40 kids in a hot room for a mandatory event staring me.
Got it now?
I had never heard of this tiny college somewhere down the peninsula. But it's there. These kids parents were rich enough to send them across the world but not rich enough to get them into the Ivy league schools. But they still exhaled a sense of entitlement.
About half way through the show, I ask a "jock" what he is going to school for.
"Play football." He says.
"Oh. Do you want to play professionally someday?"
"No. I want to get into politics."
That's the answer that had me thrown.
I think a good tackle might make debates a bit more interesting but other than that I don't know how one does anything for the other.
When I tell him this he replies, "It worked for Bush."
OK. That's the reply that got me.
First of all, this kid is 18. Who they hell idolizes Bush enough to follow his lead? Who models their academic career after Bush?
Hasn't he fucked up? A lot?
By the way. When he attended the all boy's school of Andover, he was actually a cheerleader. Google it. I'll wait. Hopefully you get to see the photo of him looking every bit the douche he is holding a megaphone as he readies himself to cheer.
There turned out to be more than a few kids who proudly called themselves conservative.
I don't get that. It's college. I never went but from what I can gather college is suppose to be all about getting laid, high and occasionally staring at a Lava lamp under the influence of Mushrooms communing with God. You don't walk in saying. I am opposed to joy! Not at 18 you don't. Course, I am getting all my info on what college is from movies.
At some point I say to the crowd that Obama scares the shit out of vast swaths of the country because he's black. In one of the most unintentionally hilarious moments I have witnessed in a long time, my statement on Obama was met with a very enthusiastic head nod in agreement from the Jock.
What were the odds a rich white kid named Kyle, was going to be scared of black people?
Welcome to California kid. I would love to see where your head is at in four years.
What caught my eye at first was his gum chewing. He was smacking away on it like it held the antidote to boredom. No matter what I said or implied, he sat there calmly chewing his gum with the erie confidence of the dim. Maybe he has more in common with Bush than I thought.
Good luck=)

1 comment:

Dean said...

Maybe he meant "baseball" and maybe he meant "Bush 41"?